Allow me to set the scene for you. E3 2003. Nintendo was showing off its major releases for the next year. It was our first year attending the time-honored and legendary event. In the limelight was Nintendo, showcasing its most anticipated games of the next 12 months and beyond, from Mario Kart: Double Dash!! to our fist look at Geist. From Soul Calibur II to Rogue Squadron III. Here we were, sitting in the hotel room, reveling in all of the Cube glory. And all we could do was sit around and play Mario Tennis on the N64. I'd always been told that Mario Tennis was a hugely fun game, but never having any real interest in the sport, I figured it just wasn't for me. From the moment I picked up the controller I was hooked. Two years and a whole lotta waiting later, Mario Power Tennis landed and I was all over it.

Nintendo made an interesting decision with this release: It is the first major game to not make a playable appearance at E3 in years. It was shown this past year in movie form, but before it was on demo discs in store kiosks mere weeks before it was released, it was never playable. This was, needless to say, a major disappointment for all of us here who were greatly anticipating playing it on the show floor this year. We feared that its absence might mean that we had to wait another year for it to come out. Well, we didn't. It's here, and it is fun.

This is one serious game of whack-a-mole.

The presentation of the game, from the opening cutscene to the menu system, is virtually identical to Mario Golf: Toadstool tour, the last Mario Sports game to appear on GameCube, also presented to us by Nintendo and Camelot. The opening of the game sets up…well, it sets up absolutely nothing. The game opens with a cutscene about five minutes in length that shows the Mario gang just having some fun playing tennis. It then moves to focus on Wario and Waluigi, who Camelot seems to have adopted as their unofficial mascots for the sports games. I'm not going to waste your time describing the pair's race from the law, stumbling upon Bowser's secret tennis lair, or their plan to dominate the tournament scene, but take my word that it is bloody hilarious, and must be seen to be believed. From there, it moves to a simple-to-navigate menu screen which allows you to choose exhibition play, tournament play, special play, options, and the rest of the standard menu screen stuff. I'll get into the specifics of each mode later on. First let's discuss something that's quite easy to discuss: How the game looks.

From the moment you watch the opening of the game, one thing will be abundantly clear to you: These character models have never looked better. Mario games have never been hugely revolutionary as far as graphics go, but that also isn't to say that they don't look great. This game is no exception to this rule. The graphics won't blow anybody away by any means, but nobody will look at them and be disappointed. Mario and the gang are impressively detailed in their own right, and background environments, as limited as they are, impress to the point that you wouldn't think that Camelot would bother make them as detailed as they are. Crowds, while fairly small, contain all individually animated spectators, made up of the normal fair of Mario characters. Lakitu hangs out on the side of the court in his cloud sporting a fishing pole, acting as a ball boy. While you won't always see him doing his job, rest assured that if you look for it at the right moment, he'll be there doing his job of getting stray balls off the court. Across from him there'll be Toadsworth sitting upon his perch, watching intently and ready to line judge the hell out of that game. There won't be anything to make you rethink your own reality, but rest assured that the game looks as good as you would want and more.

Mr. Sparkle! Join me or die!

Audio seems to be the next logical place to go. The music in this game, as you've come to expect from Mario, is catchy and infectious. Voice acting is, expectedly, underwhelming, which some would say is a flaw in the Mario universe, while others would say is part of its charm. Most characters' voices are supplied by Charles Martinet, the premiere voice actor for Mario characters since Mario first had a voice in 1996's Super Mario 64. Sound effects range from a clonk of the racket when you hit the ball to a bong on the court when it bounces. Ok, not a huge range, but its tennis, what more do you want? Each character has his or her own range of grunts and groans, laughs and taunts. It's just classic Nintendo. While it's not the greatest delight in the world to listen to, and I'm not rushing out to buy the soundtrack, just like the graphics, it's exactly what you'd expect from a game like this. Nobody is going to buy this game for the audio, and the surround sound support is nice, but seriously, don't expect John Williams-caliber orchestration. We're playing tennis, not destroying the Death Star. The most you'll get from the music is a little unconscious humming along during gameplay.

Don't like tennis? Do the names Agassi, Sampras, and Williams draw from you huge feelings of indifference? No worries, I don't like tennis either. That didn't stop me from enjoying the hell out of this game. As with Toadstool Tour, and both franchises' N64 predecessors, the genius of the game is in its simultaneous simplicity and depth. Just as Mario Golf, different combinations of the A and B buttons when hitting the ball will generate different reactions from the ball. A or B alone will simply hit the ball softly back at the opponent, useful if you're simply playing a defensive game and trying not to let a ball get past you. A-A or B-B in succession will create a power shot that will hook to the left or right, depending on the character and position of the ball. A-B will accomplish a lob-shot that will go extremely high and land in the middle or back of the court, used when playing against a blatant net-rusher. B-A is useful if your opponent is near the back of the court, as it will let you do a drop-shot that will bounce extremely lightly and very close to the net. The L button is used to lunge at the ball if it's out of your reach, and depending on the character you'll be able to lunge a long way or a short way (the Koopa characters will dive huge distances, while characters like Waluigi and Donkey Kong, who have arms the size of Canada, will merely reach out with all their might and hope their monstrous reach will do them good). Sounds simple enough, and it is. It's when you start using these combinations and dives to perfection that you'll begin to understand the depth of the game. Add to this the assortment of special power moves that each character can do and you've got yourself one crazy-ass game. At certain moments during play, your character's racket will begin to glow. When this happens, you have the option of choosing to perform a special move, either offensive or defensive. Offensive moves are designed to power a shot past the other player, or, if the player makes contact, to immobilize or move them across the court. Defensive moves are primarily used to retrieve a ball anywhere on the court, no matter how impossible it may appear to be to get to.

But Camelot didn't stop with just tennis. They've taken the next step to make sure this game takes that next step to go above and beyond anything that we expected. Gimmick courts, special games, and loads of unlockables add to the already addictive gameplay. You can choose to play a simple game of tennis on a clay, grass, or turf court (and yes, the bounce of the ball is affected by what court you decide to play on, in a way so realistic and accurate it's almost disturbing), or you can take your skills to any number of gimmick courts. Gimmick courts are just what they sound like - tennis with a twist. You can play on the lawn of Luigi's Mansion while trying to keep your light on and turning your opponent's off by landing the ball in a certain area. If the light is off, ghosts are free to come onto the court and screw around with you by making you unable to move, obstructing your view, and the like. Or you can go to the Kong jungle and play with the small Kremlins that have taken a liking to the net. Should you strike one with your ball, it will fall onto your opponent's side and do its best to attach itself to his or her leg. The more attached to their (or your) legs, the slower the character will move and the harder it will be to get to the ball. Feel like playing in the sun? Delphino Isle could be the place for you. In the town square, which until recently housed a giant statue and a kart-racing course (I guess the course rolls up and goes into storage during tennis season) is now home to a state-of-the-art tennis facility. Unfortunately, some ink-spewing pirhanna plants have decided to take root right next to it, and have no qualms about dirtying up the court. No worries, though; the Delphinoans (hey, I made up a word, good for me) thought ahead and included a switch that you can simply run over to wash off your court. So keeping your court clean and finding the ball at the same time will add a new dynamic to how you might want your character to move around the court. These are but a few examples of the gimmick courts, which also include a court based inside the Wario Ware Inc. factory, Bowser's castle, and even a classic Mario Bros. court, all of which can also be used as regular tennis courts simply by unlocking the option (no, I won't tell you how…figure it out).

This is one wacky gameshow...

Still not satisfied? How about some special games? Ring tennis, anyone? Aim the ball through gold rings on the court to try and best your opponent by collecting the designated number of rings first. Or how about paintballs? Someone has decided to make some really nice pictures, but didn't bother to color them in. Now it's up to you and your tennis skills to aim colored paintballs at the portraits of characters like Mario, Diddy Kong, Bowser, and others to finish the pictures. Did you know Chomp-Chomps eat tennis balls? Neither did I, until I started feeding them. Feed your Chomp-Chomp as many tennis balls as you can to try and best your challengers, but watch out for bombs; they make Chompy angry, and you wouldn't like him when he's angry (unless you happen to shoot the bomb at someone else's, giving yourself an advantage for a few seconds whilst they attempt to calm their new pet). I won't bore you with summaries on every single special game, simply because there are so damn many of them, but rest assured, if you want to unlock everything there is to unlock, you'll be spending a fair amount of time playing these silly, and fun, little games.

As with just about any multiplayer game put out by Nintendo, this is one of those games that anybody can pick up and play. Moments to learn, lifetime to master, and any other cliché that may be applied here. This is the true brilliance of Nintendo and Camelot, and what makes a game like this great. Any self-respecting lover of games, particularly Mario, tennis, sports, or, simply put, FUN games, needs to do themselves a service and pick this game up. With almost endless tournament, exhibition, and special games to play, you'll be spending hours both by yourself and with your friends duking it out in one of the best sports games to come out on the GameCube this year. And with Mario Baseball on the horizon, one can only wonder how far this Mario Sports franchise can go (Mario Dodgeball, anybody?).

Got your own ideas for what the next Mario Sports game should be like? Shoot me an e-mail to carl@wiicafe.com. If I get any real good ideas, you may see it appear in a future feature from me. Anyway, here are the scores: