Well, we're back. It's amazing how much easier it is to get this version of the Note done than the previous. We all like working on it and, apparently, y'all like reading it. We're all very glad to see it has become a moderate success with everyone.

This week there wasn't this great well of news from which to pick, thus our selection was a little limited. We do cover some of the news, as per usual, and we also devoted a large portion of this week to some of our thoughts, hopes, dreams, etc about the DS and Project Revolution.

A word of caution for the readers: You must remember that most of these are just ideas and supposition. These are things we want and hope to see, but it does not make them so. Some of the things we say are based on fact, but most of everything should be taken with not a grain, but a silo of salt.

With that said, I welcome everyone to another week of complete and total insanity. With me this week, as always, is Senior News Editor Joe McCollum. Also with us tonight is Senior Editor Paul Tabachneck and Staff Writer Eric Jones. Hoo-ahh!

Kevin: : First issue: Rare making more GBA games. Wait, didn't MS buy them or something long ago?

Joe: Micro-who? Go figure. I don't mind the GBA support in the least.

Eric: Is it just me, or does Mr. Pants look far too much like Carl?

Joe: Right down to only wearing nothing but underwear.

Kevin: : Dude, I don't want to think of Carl as an elephant in his...wait, it is Carl.

Eric: My only hope is that Rare also decides to do some stuff for the DS as well. Goldeneye on the DS? Mrrrrroowwwwrr......Wait, isn't GoldenEye DS being made by EA?

Kevin: : Isn't it the least bit strange though, that Rare has put out more games for GBA than for Xbox? They sex-up Kameo, yet make It's Mr. Pants.

Paul: I don't think it's strange when you consider that they sullied their good name with their first Xbox release.

Eric: It's smart. Remember, the GBA is the highest-selling system in the world. That crappy Zombie game, right?

Joe: Not entirely, many of their games were already completed. They either had to be remade (like Donkey Kong Coconut Crackers -> Mr. Pants), or had to be delayed because of the THQ settling.

Paul: I mean, have you played "Grabbed by the Ghoulies?" What a piece of shit...

Kevin: : First of all, Paul, I don't know how good their name was to begin with, and yes, I guess what little respect they had they lost with that atrocity to humanity.

Eric: I never thought Rare was that good of a developer anyway. They've made 4 good games - that's it. 3 happen to be really good.

Joe: Also keeping in mind I think most of the people not working on the GBA team have probably left, what with having to work on Xbox.

Paul: Rare will always be the Donkey Kong Country team for me, and that keeps them in my good graces.

Eric: Don't forget GoldenEye and Perfect Dark and for those with demolition fetishes, Blast Corps.

Joe: Perfect Dark Zero on the DS would be very interesting, and a slap in the face to the Xboxers.

Kevin: : I will always view Rare as the horrible Collect-a-thon teams who made me want to light fire to my own pants.

Paul: Right, that too. They are very good at making games for well-established platforms that explore potential that other developers haven't.

Joe: Rare did have a lot of collecting going on, I will admit (and got worse as time went on), but I enjoyed many of their games.

Kevin: : I cannot nor ever will forgive them for ruining Jet Force Gemini with the damn tribals.

Eric: Banjo-Kazooie/Tooie and Diddy Kong Racing did have their moments, I will admit. But still - an adventure racing game?

Joe: Hey, whatever works. One other thing I feel like I should mention. It's astounding how much underwear they're fitting into one game.

Eric: I guess DOA Beach Volleyball made them jealous.

Kevin: : I don't even know if this is good news or not. Underwear...like...it's not even cool stuff like ladies undergarments or anything. It's some dude's briefs. The symbol of the Republican Party running around in his skivvies. I mean…when did you ever have a good piece of Elephant?

Paul: What, are you afraid to acknowledge dude's briefs?

Joe: It's okay man, breathe.

Kevin: : I'm not even going to dignify that with a response, Mr. I-Forgot-Last-Week-And-Showed-Up-Late-This-Week.

Joe: He's got you there, Paul.

Kevin: : Alas, we move on to a new topic because Elephants in briefs creep me out a little.

Eric: Hell, Carl in general creeps me out.

Paul: Closet elephant lover.

Kevin: : Next topic: Star Fox delayed again. Nobody really shocked. Joe kills all.

Joe: Joe kill. Joe smash.

Kevin: : Eric, you spent some time with this demo at E3, didn't you?

Eric: No surprise here. At E3, the game seemed far from complete. Not as bad as 2003, but the controls were still a little wonky, and the voice acting was horrendous.

Paul: Yeah, games get delayed. See Doom 3, see Half-Life 2, and see Star Fox.

Joe: The voice acting was last minute NOA toss-ins though. I am happy it will get the polish it needs though.

Kevin: : Yes, Paul, but Doom 3 and Half-Life 2 are real games, not Star Fox.

Eric: It's like Miyamoto says. The more we wait, the better it will be. And remember, if Shiggy says it, it must be true.

Kevin: : Star Fox really strikes me as the game that 12 guys are making in their basement after the weekly Dungeons and Dragons game.

Paul: It's interesting that you feel that the real games are not coming to the GameCube. But, whatever....

Kevin: : Can we really say that we're shocked, though? What do you think Nintendo has up their sleeves pushing this back even more?

Paul: Well, they're developing two new systems and just as many new modes of control.

Joe: Not too shocked I guess. Like I said in the news update: If nothing else, this eases my pocket book this fourth quarter. Namco is making this though Paul, not Nintendo.

Eric: Probably the fact that they want to keep pushing Metroid Prime 2. It's clearly the game Nintendo is using to go against the 2 big guns of Sony and Microsoft this holiday season. Namely GTA: San Andreas and Halo 2.

Kevin: : Prime 2 is not a destroyer of GTA and Halo 2. GTA comes out the start of October and Halo 2 on Nov. 9.

Paul: Right now, I can't find time to care. I have myself too psyched about Pokemon.

Joe: Don't forget, they have the DS in November too. MP2 and the DS makes it a heavy month.

Eric: and then Star Fox and RE4 in January.

Joe: Assuming either of them makes it that early, Eric.

Eric: And Joe, how dare you leave off Baten Kaitos.

Joe: Which is also a Namco game.

Paul: I will say, on the record, that I have taken a vacation day on Nov. 9th.

Kevin: : RE4 will be out in Jan., but I'm betting Star Fox takes the new Nintendo hot-month of March.

Paul: I will be unavailable for any kind of correspondence on that day. Phones unplugged, mIRC closed.

Joe: Mmm, I do expect Star Fox in about February/March-ish.

Eric: As far as I'm concerned, it's all just leading up to Zelda.

Kevin: : And now we take a little break from structured conversation and break free a little, assuming Paul can behave, to discuss our hopes, dreams, ideas and so forth about the DS.

Eric: I have to say, looking at the U.S. Lineup, I'm very, very happy. EA bringing Madden to the DS is a blessing, as I see the DS as being perfect for Sports games. Baseball will probably be great on it too.

Eric: That, and Square-Enix basically making the game it's adopted kid, while all the PSP is getting is a silly movie.

Paul: I want a Pokémon game for the DS, with one screen functioning as a stylus-controlled Pokédex

Joe: Paul knows what we need.

Kevin: : I want that air hockey tech demo I played at E3. That fucker was fun!

Joe: The DS isn't out yet and I know my list is hella long.

Paul: I would also like to see a game that uses the two screens at width, turning the controls sideways.

Joe: I just hope the games don't go over $30-35.

Eric: GoldenEye...Viewtiful Joe DS... And that Yu-Gi-Oh game, which was surprisingly fun.

Kevin: : What do you expect to be the connection between DS and Revolution?

Paul: I think it'll be much like the GBA to the GCN, except wireless.

Kevin: : I don't mean literal connection, Paul. I mean a correlation.

Eric: Agreed. Not to mention, I think that the online capability of the DS will have something to do with it.

Paul: I think the DS will function as a wireless controller for certain games.

Joe: I'm really not entirely sure yet, the Revolution is still so mysterious.

Paul: Obviously it can't be used much for this, but some games are structured for that kind of ease.

Kevin: : I was thinking just the same thing, Paul. Do we think that the DS and Revolution may be hand in hand, unlike the GBA/GCN Connection?

Eric: The Revolution has to be online. It's practically a requirement for game systems now.

Joe: If Nintendo works it right, that could be very possible. The question just is: Will they?

Eric: They have to. This is make or break time for Nintendo. If the PSP does as well as Sony is touting, we could very well become XBoxCafe by the end of '05.

Joe: Don't joke like that, Eric.

Paul: I think they'll come up with a game for the Revolution that you can only control with two DS units.

Kevin: : Yeah, it's called Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles.

Kevin: : It seems strange though - this time before launch of the GBA, everyone and their mother had theirs pre-ordered and were chomping at the bit to get one. Hell, I imported my GBA from Hong Kong. Yet the DS has had no real press. I am the only person at my local GameStop to have a DS reserved.

Joe: Of course, the GBA had been more heavily advertised at this point in time--yeah. I'm waiting for Nintendo start on their advertising blitz. Probably as soon as they announce a date and price point.

Kevin: : Yes, childrens, you can reserve your DS at your local GameStop with just 25 dollars down.

Paul: This fits into my theory that the DS might be too much too soon.

Kevin: : The latest GameInformer has an article on the final design of the DS, and it's really starting to pick up, but people's opinions are tenuous at best about it so far.

Paul: The GBA was a necessary evolution. The GBColor was working off antiquated technology, and people were getting sick of its limits. The GBA is still making its rounds

Kevin: : Before E3, I was very weary myself, wondering if this could be the beginning of the end. Having played the DS, though, I knew I had to have one right then.

Eric: So then what about the PSP? Does crappy battery life; a crappy software idea, a crappy price and a crappy company make for a DS killing machine?

Joe: A lot of minds might change too once demo units get out. It worked at E3, after all.

Kevin: : That is where I think the real change will happen. I know a lot of people who were stoked about the N-Gage and then played the demo unit and ended up throwing up outside the store.

Joe: Wow, they made it outside.

Kevin: : Company policy, Joe.

Eric: Indeed. The new design is exactly what the doctor ordered. Plus, Nintendo has clearly said this system will be driven towards an older audience, while the GBA will remain the kid-driven system.

Joe: I enjoy the rumoured $150 price point for it, which should be a nice edge. I don't see a $100 PSP.

Eric: It WORKED at E3, but did it really? The PSP was the best of show from nearly every single gaming media outlet; even with it's highly limited booth area and no playable demos.

Joe: I'm still curious about the stuff going around saying some/most/all of the stuff there wasn't even running the actual PSP hardware.

Eric: Not to mention calling it the "New Walkman" and saying it will destroy not only the DS and the GBA in sales and force Nintendo out of business. Still not joking, kids.

Kevin: : I fear for the life of Nintendo. There are far too many stupid people in the world that will buy a PSP just because it's Sony and not buy a DS because it's from Nintendo.

Paul: I don't think that's true.

Joe: I'm hoping the price point, memory stick, mini-PS2, battery life, etc. issues will be the major turn off.

Paul: Sony is an unproven manufacturer of handhelds -- Nintendo is not. Sony is using an unproven media format. Nintendo is not.

Kevin: : I don't trust Sony as far as I can throw them, and I sure as hell won't be buying a PSP, but I know a lot of people who have already pledged undying support to it.

Paul: Oh, I'm probably getting one. But that's just because I like having all the toys. I'm not calling a winner because I think they're two very different systems.

Eric: But Sony does know how to make games to get the fanboys rustling. If they can get a GTA as a launch title, as well as that Final Fantasy movie, well, can you say thrashfest?

Joe: Here's another thing to think about - One of the reasons (not the only) that PS2 has so many sales is because PS2's break quite often. If the PSP is very expensive, some people are going to be that willing to get one and risk it breaking. You can buy a PS2 again for under $200. You can't just keep buying PSP's.

Kevin: : I do think, in part, the success or failure of the DS will rest in the hands of the Revolution.

Eric: Like I said, a system is only as good as its games. Sony has three big franchises - GTA, Final Fantasy, and Madden. If they can get each title as a launch title, then hoo boy.

Paul: I disagree there, too. Not for nothing, Kevin, but the GBA could not depend less on the GCN.

Kevin: : GBA had no real competition. It was a beast all it's own. Rumor has it that Xbox Next will be the first console out of the gate, with Revolution next and PS3 last. Could it be that Sony is only releasing the PSP to keep fans and developers in check while the PS3 is in development?

Joe: Yes. Sony has said they will release many things between now and the PS3. Such as the PSX thing, PS2 upgrades, etc. Just lots of overkill.

Kevin: : I've heard rumor that PS3 will not see release before 2007. That's a long time away.

Eric: that, and it will cost $500.

Joe: And a lot of junk for Sony to release in the meantime.

Kevin: : I think the DS will depend heavily on the Revolution for support, and vice versa. People will want new systems, not add-ons. It didn't work for Sega way back when; I don't see it working now.

Joe: It'll be interesting to see how all of this turns out. And I suppose we'll find out come E3.

Eric: If one thing is certain, Nintendo knows what they are doing. We must trust in Reggie.

Joe: Nintendo knows all.

Kevin: : People will buy Xbox 2 and Revolution just because they are new, and though they may buy a PSP and/or a DS, if Nintendo plays their cards right and incorporates DS support into early games, and it doesn't suck like some of the GBA Connectivity then people will buy more DS to play with the Revolution, than buy more PSP to not use on the PS3 that isn't out yet.

Joe: Reggie will have sex with a PS3, break it in half while doing so, and given the semen-covered remains to a Sony exec while he crumbles the remaining pieces. ... I'm sorry.

Kevin: : I think that's the first time we actually said semen in the EN. Well done, Joe.

Joe: Score.

Eric: But like I said, the Revolution has to be online. I think the fact that it will plug into a computer screen kind of gives that away.

Paul: It's not. It will come cloaked in a field of gamma field distortion. ...Or something.

Kevin: : While on the topic of the Revolution - what the Hell is this thing going to look like?

Joe: I thought the design that won in the IGN contest a while back looked pretty sweet. I want standard wireless control ports though.

Paul: Anyways, it'll be invisible, and spiky.

Kevin: : I'm totally seeing a pyramid shape.

Joe: http://www.nintendoclub.it/funclub/notizie/nintendo_nexus_large.jpg which can be seen here, by the way.

Kevin: : If that design were a woman, I'd totally marry it.

Paul: ...in any case, the Nexus design does look cool. It also looks dated. I love the GameCube because its design is timeless. It's... well, it's a Cube.

Kevin: : There's not really much else to say with our very limited knowledge about both DS and Revolution.

Joe: It's not a Cube until you put the GB Player on there.

Eric: It's our beloved Purple Lunchbox.

Paul: Well yeah, but if you don't put the GBP on there, I don't even wanna know you.

Joe: Mine's black, thanks.

Paul: Mine too

Kevin: : I do know one thing - I want a bigger controller, Nintendo. Take your little Nintendo Hands and get some giant Mickey Mouse hands and give me a bigger controller, gawd dammit.

Paul: I think Microsoft's original Xbox controller was the right thing. I love them potatoes.

Joe: Nintendo's controller fits fine for me. I think they should take the producing two sizes approach and make one for each set of people.

Eric: And find a better spot for the Z button. and make the A button a bit smaller.

Joe: I'm fine with the A button, they could probably put two grooves in the back and make a W and Z button. Or something of that nature.

Kevin: : Knowing Nintendo and their ability to totally change the controller from system to system, I think we can expect something new and fresh. Hopefully more Xbox and less PS2.

Joe: I'm not fond of the PS2 controller much, to be honest.

Paul: I'm intrigued by their "your body is the controller" idea. I think it would be great if the Revolution were a VR chamber that required a room in your house. "We'll have technicians out to install it on Thur... wait, you did soundproof the room, right?"

Kevin: : I love the PowerGlove. It's so bad.

Joe: Regardless though, I thoroughly hope I'll be there this E3 and get to see the Revolution, any DS connectyness, or even GBA2 stuff firsthand.

Eric: And playable Zelda. PLAAAYAABBLLEEE ZZEEEELLLDDDAAAA!!!!

Joe: Zelda would be nice.

Paul: I don't think they'll release it until it's playable, dude.

Kevin: : As our final note tonight, I must address our own A.B. Osborne and his dire need for a mental hospital.

Eric: Carl is a pretty good voice actor, though. "Waa ha haa?"

Joe: For a second I thought Carl had an automatic Carl = Mental word association.

Kevin: : And to bring a close to THE WORST EDITOR'S NOTE WE'VE EVER DONE

Joe: And not a moment too soon.

Eric: Sorry.

Paul: Long live Sewer Shark! ..and Sammy Lightfoot! Jump! Jump! Duck! Jurassic Park is frightening in the dark, all the dinosaurs are running wild...

Eric: Fuck All Ya'll.

Joe: Join us next week when we further make your soul hurt.

Kevin: : Goodnight, San Francisco!